T-Mobile's Royal Wedding Dance celebrates the marriage of William and Kate with the help of a host of royal look alikes and music from East 17! T-Mobile wishes William and Kate a long and happy marriage.
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
Friday, April 29, 2011
Wedding entrance dance to top all wedding entrance dances
Tuesday, April 19, 2011
Hello? ... it's Alan calling, Alan from Earth....
[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?&v=UK4ZrWwhIm4]
Lyrics to the God Song. Great stuff!
Yeah, Hello? Uh, if you're there pick up, okay listen it's Alan calling, Alan from Earth. You probably don't remember, it's over in the western spiral of the Milky Way although obviously you might have named it after a completely different brand of chocolate. Basically just find the Oort Cloud and ask for directions from there. Anyway just calling to catch up. We're doing alright with the carbon base lifeform thing. Kids are diversifying nicely, going through a bit of a fad for spines and brains at the minute but it's probably the same where you are. Well, that's about it really, we just hadn't heard from you in a while, like when we killed Michael Rennie or Klaatu, as you knew him in The Day The Earth Stood Still. So if you received this, get in touch, but actually thinking about it, don't bother calling after about, what, 2150, because I'm not expecting anyone to be in. Oh and I'm sending this song along it's called God Song by Robert Wyatt. I hope you like it. And that you don't communicate through perfume or minor variatrions in your sense of balance or something. Okay, you take care and I'll talk to you soon. Love you, Bye.
via The Daily Grail
Lyrics to the God Song. Great stuff!
God Song (Wyatt, Miller)
What on earth are you doing God? is this some sort of joke you're playing?
Is it 'cause we didn't pray?
Well I can't see the point of the words without the action
Are you just hot air breathing over us? and overall
is it fun watching us all?
Where's your son? we want him again
Next time you send your boy down here
Give him a wife and a sexy daughter - someone we can understand
Who's got some ideas we use really relate to
we've all read your rules - tried them. Learned them in school then tried them
They're impossible rules you've made us look fools
Well done God but now please
don't hunt me down for heaven's sake! You know that I'm only joking. Aren't I?
Pardon me - I'm very drunk but I know what I'm trying to say
And It's nearly night time and we're still alone waiting
For something unknown Still waiting
So throw down a stone or something
Give us a sign for Christ's sake
Friday, April 1, 2011
Friday, March 11, 2011
No Joke: America's First Laughing Competition Guffaws Off Ground
It's no joke: The United States' first-ever laughing championship takes place Saturday in San Luis Obispo, Calif., and a few dozen gigglers, guffawers and chortlers will yuck it up in hopes of winning the coveted title of "California's Best Laugher."
We're serious: It's a laughing contest and the contestants will compete in events such as "Best Diabolical Laugh" and "Most Contagious Laugh" and face off in "Laughter Duels" to see who can make the other person crack up most.
And while just mentioning the contest is enough to make some skeptics start rolling on the floor in ridicule, it's part of a serious effort by Albert Nerenberg to raise awareness of the power of laughter.
Nerenberg is a self-proclaimed "laughologist" who started noticing the power of laughter while, inexplicably, watching Ultimate Fighting Championship bouts.Before all these fights, there is a stare-down and, many times, the fighters begin to spontaneously laugh," Nerenberg told AOL News. "They triggered laughter through eye contact and their proximity to each other. This is not uncommon."
Nerenberg decided to take the laughter to its inevitable conclusion by having contests in which people compete for the best laugh, rather than punch each other's lights out. ...
"I do recommend contestants eat a light meal before the contest and make sure to hydrate because you will be using a lot of energy," she said.
One of the potential contestants, Marcia Alter, is an accomplished laugher and says the key to laughing long, loud and hard is to "empty out the right brain so you feel a connectedness with everything."
She has some other advice as well.
"Yes, you should go to the bathroom first," she said.
via No Joke: America's First Laughing Competition Guffaws Off Ground.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Laughter eases hospital pain
... "In the future, patients watching humorous videos could become a standard component of some medical procedures."
The US study, Rx Laughter, is a collaboration between the entertainment industry, paediatrics and psychiatry.
They asked 21 children aged eight to 14 to put their hand into cold water and found the whole group tolerated the temperature longer while watching a funny video.
Those who laughed most remembered less of the pain and hormone tests on their saliva showed their stress levels were lower after laughing. ...
via BBC News | HEALTH | Laughter eases hospital pain.
Just make sure your patient doesn't have Coulrophobia before you put on that red nose.
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Blank book on sex outsells 'Harry Potter', 'Da Vinci Code'
So what does every man think apart from sex? Apparently nothing, claims British author who has written a book on it.
Quite fittingly, the book has just a cover and 200 blank pages inside.
Sheridan Simove's What Every Man Thinks About Apart From Sex has become a surprise bestseller on Amazon.com.
The book has hit number 744 on the Amazon list, ahead of Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code (number 2,910) and JK Rowling's Harry Potter And The Order Of The Phoenix (2,406).
It is also picking up as a novelty gift among amused uni students in the UK who are flocking to grab a copy of the $7.95 paperback .
A student from Nottingham University says she picked up the copy for her friend.
"I bought a copy for my mate as a joke and he started using it as a note pad for lectures. Now everyone seems to have one. It's started a real craze on campus".
The book’s 'author' says he never expected his work to become a bestseller.
"When the book was published I never imagined in my wildest dreams that I would outsell Harry Potter. But Britain's students seem to think my book is magic and who am I to argue?" Simove has been quoted as saying by news reports.
An Oxford University psychology graduate, 39-year-old Simove says his next research project is a PhD on the subject of what women think apart from sex.
"I hope to publish my findings in another decade," he jokes. ...
via Blank book on sex outsells 'Harry Potter', 'Da Vinci Code' - Seven News Queensland.
Reader comments:
... Nothing new...I've got a copy of a book from the 1980's called "The Achievements Of The Labour Government", a little black paperback, and it too is totally blank when you open it up.
... The author has just coppied what Cheech and Chong did. They released a movie called "youve been ripped off". Sold out and it was just 1.5 hours of blank screen then a big YOUVE BEEN RIPPED OFF across the screen.
... Another case of plagiarism......Alan Pease published a book "What men know about women" 25 years ago.......blank pages...I still have the signed copy.
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Stephen Colberg is Anonymous. ;-)
All the conspiracy folk out there should love this one: a few nights ago, Stephen Colbert had Glenn Greenwald on to discuss the showdown between security firm HBGary and the Wikileaks-supporting internet 'vigilante' hacking group Anonymous which has been making news of late. Towards the end of the interview, keen-eyed viewers may have picked up a little 'video glitch' - and if they were interested enough, they may have investigated further and found this 'subliminal' one-frame overlay on top of Colbert's face...
Yes that's right - Colbert has a Guy Fawkes mask graphic over his face, a symbol intimately associated with 'Anonymous', derived from the Alan Moore comic series 'V for Vendetta'. Here's some video from the interview so you can see the subliminal insert (at around 4:22 into the video):
...
via Daily Grail Frontpage | TDG - Science, Magick, Myth and History.
This video cracked me up.
Wednesday, February 23, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Thursday, February 10, 2011
The head-shaving helmet?
Jennifer Madison - It makes the traditional shave look like something from the dark ages.
A New York resident has created a head-shaving helmet that speeds through the job in just 20 seconds.
The headgear has four blades powered by two motors mounted on Teflon-coated aluminium rails, complete with a shaving cream injection system.
It also boasts LED lights which indicate when the cycle is over - and its user can breathe a sigh of relief.
In a video posted on URLesque.com, the inventor, introduced simply as Boris, is shown testing his contraption on a brave volunteer.
Strapping on the device onto his bare head, the test subject understandably pleads with his counterpart to 'pray for me' before the switch is turned on.
Sporting a quizzical look, the man describes the sensation as 'a little strange' as the razors shave the little left of his hair.
Meanwhile, Boris does his best to convince sceptics scared of gruesome injury, suggesting that head-shaving helmet won't leave its users bloodied and reaching for a bandage.
Explaining the advantage of using his device, the Brooklynite says, 'When you shave your head manually you move back and forth and laterally, which is what the helmet is doing right now, times four.'
Luckily, the demo goes off without a nick. ...
via The head-shaving helmet: New device nicks minutes off hair grooming regime | Mail Online.
Reader comment at the Daily Mail web site:
More top quality reporting from the DM! If past experience is anything to go by, you'll run another story in a day or two poking fun at those who were taken in by this hoax. Whilst carefully not mentioning that your reporter was top of the list.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
3D without glasses?
Comments:
- This is a horrible idea. The abrasion from your eyelids opening and closing this much is pretty much guaranteed to cause eye damage, not to mention what it'll do to your eyelid muscles.
- I'm no 3D engineer, but I feel pretty safe saying that there's no freaking way you could make a human eyelid blink fast enough, even with electric stimulation, to mimic the shutter effect of the glasses used to view certain 3D content. I'm laughing way harder at all the serious comments from you guys.. Next time try listening more closely for that whooshing sound, it's the joke flying right over your head.
via Engadget
Pretty funny. Some really fine CG work.
Saturday, November 27, 2010
Mythbusters' Savage: I got past TSA with razor blades
[youtube=
Many of you will be flying today. You will be going to see those to whom you feel closest, or, indeed, most indifferent, in order to give thanks for your feelings.
You will also have to enjoy the watchful eyes, hands and smiles of the TSA inspectorate.
You may not find it entirely comfortable. However, like "Mythbusters" presenter Adam Savage, in the rush to leave the house, you may have forgotten that you have a couple of 12-inch razor blades secreted about your person.
Savage, in the highly entertaining monologue that I have embedded, describes how earlier this year he was flying and happened to forget to remove potentially dangerous objects from his belongings.
via Mythbusters' Savage: I got past TSA with razor blades | Technically Incorrect - CNET News.
Mythbusters' Savage: I got past TSA with razor blades
[youtube=
Many of you will be flying today. You will be going to see those to whom you feel closest, or, indeed, most indifferent, in order to give thanks for your feelings.
You will also have to enjoy the watchful eyes, hands and smiles of the TSA inspectorate.
You may not find it entirely comfortable. However, like "Mythbusters" presenter Adam Savage, in the rush to leave the house, you may have forgotten that you have a couple of 12-inch razor blades secreted about your person.
Savage, in the highly entertaining monologue that I have embedded, describes how earlier this year he was flying and happened to forget to remove potentially dangerous objects from his belongings.
via Mythbusters' Savage: I got past TSA with razor blades | Technically Incorrect - CNET News.
Friday, November 5, 2010
The perpetually capsizing boat freaks out boaters everywhere
This boat may look like it's sinking fast, but don't worry, it's perfectly upright. That's because this boat, called "Love Love," was designed to look like it's in the process of going under.The boat has a built-in motor and is able to move around just like any other boat, albeit a boat that will draw a lot more attention than your standard dinghy. It was created by artist Julien Berthier, and he's since taken it out to all sorts of places such as Canary Wharf in London and Normandy, Francy.
via The perpetually capsizing boat freaks out boaters everywhere | DVICE.
The perpetually capsizing boat freaks out boaters everywhere
via The perpetually capsizing boat freaks out boaters everywhere | DVICE.
Monday, September 27, 2010
No Joke: Comedian Bob Marley Breaks Record for World's Longest Stand-Up Routine
One of the basic rules of comedy is that shorter is better than long. However, comedian Bob Marley is throwing that notion on its head.
On Thursday night at 11:02 p.m. EST, Marley set a new world record for the longest continuous stand-up routine.
The comedian, who has been performing all over the United States for the past two decades, started his laughable world record attempt at a comedy club in Portland, Maine, early Wednesday morning and didn't stop until late Thursday -- exactly 40 hours later.
Basically, Marley did a 40-hour work week in a day and a half, breaking the previous record of 38 hours and 16 minutes, set by Australian comedian Lindsay Webb in October.According to Oliver Keithly, who owns the Maine Comedy Connection where Marley performed and serves as the comic's tour manager, the idea for the attempt has been 18 months in the making.
"Bob was with some other comics having steaks and beers doing what comedians usually do when they get together: talk about comedy," Keithly told AOL News. "They started talking about the longest stand-up routine and, after Googling it, discovered it was 36 hours and 15 minutes, set by Irish comic Tommy Tiernan.
"Since then, Lindsay Webb set a new record, and Bob decided he wanted to do 40 hours."
Finding the date to do this was a difficult task.
"Basically, it took so long to set up because this was the only weekend Bob had free," Keithly said. "A friend of his is getting married on Saturday, so he'd knew he'd be in town."
Besides finding the time, the other big challenge was finding the material.
"Bob has 19 CDs of material out -- and only one is a greatest hits package," he said. "He had to go back and listen to material he did 15 to 18 years ago. It took him two weeks, and when he showed up at the club, the set list was like an NFL playbook."
He did his homework well. Marley was able to go 17 hours and 14 minutes before he repeated himself.
In order for the record to count, there has to be at least 10 paying customers watching him at all times. Keithly says that wasn't a problem.
"We're doing this event for the Barbara Bush Children's Hospital at Maine Medical Center, so there were a lot of people supporting the charity," Keithly said. "Plus, Bob donates a lot of his time to charities, so there were a lot of people there just to support him. The club holds about 140 people and at 4 a.m., we still had 100 people in the club -- this from an area with around 80,000 people." ...
via No Joke: Comedian Bob Marley Breaks Record for World's Longest Stand-Up Routine.
Friday, September 24, 2010
'Pubic Schools' Billboard Is a Major Misspelling
The city of South Bend, Ind., must be very proud of the sex ed classes in its schools. The spelling classes, not so much.
A billboard designed to promote South Bend's public school system ended up giving passers-by a very different message when proofreaders omitted the letter "l."
The sign urged motorists to visit SouthBendOn.com, where they could read up on the "15 best things about our pubic schools."Yes, pubic schools.
The Blue Waters Group -- a company tapped by the city to promote South Bend -- said it was responsible for erecting the misspelled digital billboard, according to SouthBendTribune.com.
"I feel terrible. It's a mistake we made, and we're guilty of it and responsible for it, and we take full responsibility for the error," Patrick Strickler, president of the Blue Waters Group, told the press.
"Four people looked at it, eyeballed it and didn't see the mistake, and those people all work for me," he added. "We take responsibility for it. We simply blew it. We did not see the missing 'L.'"
Workers installed the digital billboard on Sept. 16 and took it down on Monday, according to Wane.com.
via 'Pubic Schools' Billboard Is a Major Misspelling.
Here's the theme song for this mistake: Take the L out of public and it's privates.
Saturday, September 18, 2010
Woody Allen on Faith and Fortune Tellers
..“To me,” Mr. Allen said, “there’s no real difference between a fortune teller or a fortune cookie and any of the organized religions. They’re all equally valid or invalid, really. And equally helpful.”
Mr. Allen spoke with Dave Itzkoff about his new film, how its themes resonate in his life and whether he has made his last movie in New York. These are excerpts from that conversation.
Q. The ideas of psychic powers and past lives, or at least people who believe in them, are central to your latest film. What got you interested in writing about them?
A. I was interested in the concept of faith in something. This sounds so bleak when I say it, but we need some delusions to keep us going. And the people who successfully delude themselves seem happier than the people who can’t. I’ve known people who have put their faith in religion and in fortune tellers. So it occurred to me that that was a good character for a movie: a woman who everything had failed for her, and all of a sudden, it turned out that a woman telling her fortune was helping her. The problem is, eventually, she’s in for a rude awakening.
Q. What seems more plausible to you, that we’ve existed in past lives, or that there is a God?
A. Neither seems plausible to me. I have a grim, scientific assessment of it. I just feel, what you see is what you get.
Q. How do you feel about the aging process?
A. Well, I’m against it. [laughs] I think it has nothing to recommend it. You don’t gain any wisdom as the years go by. You fall apart, is what happens. People try and put a nice varnish on it, and say, well, you mellow. You come to understand life and accept things. But you’d trade all of that for being 35 again. I’ve experienced that thing where you wake up in the middle of the night and you start to think about your own mortality and envision it, and it gives you a little shiver. That’s what happens to Anthony Hopkins at the beginning of the movie, and from then on in, he did not want to hear from his more realistic wife, “Oh, you can’t keep doing that — you’re not young anymore.” Yes, she’s right, but nobody wants to hear that.
Q. Has getting older changed your work in any way? Do you see a certain wistfulness emerging in your later films?
A. No, it’s too hit or miss. There’s no rhyme or reason to anything that I do. It’s whatever seems right at the time. I’ve never once in my life seen any film of mine after I put it out. Ever. I haven’t seen “Take the Money and Run” since 1968. I haven’t seen “Annie Hall” or “Manhattan” or any film I’ve made afterward. If I’m on the treadmill and I’m scooting through the channels, and I come across one of them, I go right past it instantly, because I feel it could only depress me. I would only feel, “Oh God, this is so awful, if I could only do that again.” ...
Q. When you’ve got down time between projects, as you do now, how do you spend it?
A. I do the usual stuff. I take my kids to school in the morning. I go for walks with my wife, play with my jazz band. Then there’s the obligation of the treadmill, and the weights, to keep in shape, so I don’t get more decrepit than I am. I generally don’t see the big Hollywood movies. I saw “Winter’s Bone” the other day and liked the movie very much, loved all the performers. And when I was in Paris, I got a chance to read a certain amount, Tolstoy and Norman Mailer. Things that had slipped through the cracks over the years.
Q. I half-expected to see you at that 12-hour performance of Dostoyevsky’s “Demons” that Lincoln Center Festival produced over the summer.
A. No, no, I’m a lowbrow. I read that material, more out of obligation than enjoyment. For enjoyment, for me, it’s a beer and the football game.
via Woody Allen on Faith and Fortune Tellers - Question - NYTimes.com.
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Monty Python fans in pilgrimage to Scottish castle
Monty Python fans from around the world are preparing to make a special pilgrimage to a 14th century Scottish castle to mark the 35th anniversary of a cult movie.
Fans of Monty Python and the Holy Grail, based on the legend of King Arthur, have been visiting historic Doune Castle in Stirling since the movie was filmed at the site.
The cult fans are estimated to account for around a third of the 25,000 visitors to the castle each year.
Historic Scotland's First Farewell Monty Python Day, on September 12, will be the latest special event staged at Doune Castle for fans since the first in 2004.
Nick Finnigan, Doune Castle events manager, said: "For this year's Python day, we're returning to the less structured, more spontaneous format of our early events, and of course, loads of fun and games.
"We've got some of the most popular comic sketches being recreated, prizes for the best costumes, a trail, Monty Python and the Holy Trail, highlighting the various filming locations of scenes from the film, a quiz with prizes, singing, and of course, lots of coconut shells."
Coconut shells have been a fixture at Doune since the Holy Grail film became a cult hit. Visitors use them to mimic horses' hooves, just as King Arthur (Graham Chapman) and his faithful servant, Patsy (Terry Gilliam) did in the film's opening scene.
Python team
Gilliam and Chapman starred in the film along with Michael Palin, Eric Idle, John Cleese and Terry Jones.
Jones made a vocal return to Doune last year when he recorded the castle's new audio guide.
The tape begins: "Welcome to Doune Castle. I'm Terry Jones, and in 1974 some friends and myself made a very silly film here called Monty Python and the Holy Grail."
via Monty Python fans in pilgrimage to Scottish castle | Scotland | STV News.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Saturday is Read Comics in Public Day
This Saturday, across the globe, I and hordes of my fellow comics readers will take our passion to the streets. And the parks. And the trains, buses and subways. And the bars.
If I know my people, the bars will figure largely.
We will grab a stack of comics and go forth into the wide world. Brave will we be. Powerful, expressionless, serene. We will brook no jeering, and fear no bullies. We will walk with our shoulders back and un-punched. Will hold our un-noogied heads high.
We will find a place amid the hurly-burly to sit. And there...we will sit. And we will read comics.
via Saturday is Read Comics in Public Day: Come Out, Come Out Wherever You Are : Monkey See : NPR.
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